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Apostle Paul article6
Change Your Focus--Change Your Habit article11
The Meaning of Trust article16 article21 Source and Christianity Ever since I can remember, somewhere deep inside I've always carried a certain amount of frustration regarding the message taught by both Catholicism and Christianity. While attending Catholic schools when I was a child, as I listened to the nuns and priests speak about Source, many questions were raised within me, none of which I was ever able to get a satisfactory answer for. Considering everything they told me, the thing that made the least sense of all was that Source knew everything there was to know and yet somehow I had free choice. What kind of choice did I have about going to heaven or hell if Source already knew which way I was headed? I had a real problem with the fact that Source supposedly already knew. What kind of a Source would create a human being in the first place, if it knew that human was going to choose hell? I was told Source loves me but this sounded like a sadistic Source, one who enjoys watching other people suffer. After all, if Source knows all, then at any given time it knows exactly how many people are either in hell already or are on their way to hell—and yet, it keeps right on making more of them. Not only that, but it actually created this place of Hell in the first place. I couldn't fathom this. Heck, if I was a parent, why would I have a place somewhere that is pure hell, just waiting in case one of my kids does something that I absolutely forbid. Such thinking is outrageous. Another thing that boggled my mind was the concept of original sin. Here I was, a newborn baby, innocent, pure, and yet doomed to hell unless I was baptized (or later I was told, unless I accepted Jesus as my savior) because of something (they called the fall of man) that happened eons ago? Go figure. That was stretching things a bit too much for me. Oh, the fear that I had because of that! What about those people who never had a chance to be baptized? The priests told me it was unfortunate they were cursed at birth, but that was why Source had sent it’s missionaries out all over the world, to give all people the opportunity to look upon a dead man hanging on a cross and accept in their heart that this dead man was their lord and savior. To me, this sounded more like something some pirates had made up. Nope, the majority of the entire civilized world, they told me, believed this idea, and that's why the calendar was dated from his birth. What they didn't tell me was that Christianity was not the only religion; that other cultures had their own religious beliefs and calendars and that these other religions did not accept Jesus, but that's not the issue here. As far as I'm concerned, I was born just fine the first time around, thank you very much. Then there was the idea that we were all made in the image of Source. On the surface this made sense. I mean, what other image could Source have made us in but its own? It seems like a no brainer to start with, but wait. What about all those horrible things that humans do such as hate and kill each other? Wouldn't that also be in the image of Source? I mean think about it, what about Source. Isn't it a horrible, even despicable act to have a pre-meditated plan to cast even one of Its children into a place known as the "nether gloom", forever—just for doing something they couldn't help doing since they were born with the innate ability to do "wrong" due to this original sin? Remember, this was Source’s idea. It didn’t have to choose to pass on this curse to all future generations if it didn’t want to! Well, I was told such things did not reflect Source, but rather, the devil. That really confused me. Where the hell did this devil come from? Didn't Source make it too? Well, yes, but they said the devil's nature isn't in the image of Source. No? How did they figure that? Well, apparently the devil was originally an angel that Source had made but who decided to rebel against Source. Because it hated Source, it came up with many ideas of how it could tempt humans (since we were Source's pride and joy) to turn against Source too, thinking this would piss Source off. Having such an attitude was not I was told, the nature of Source. But where did the capacity to hate another come from if it wasn't Source? Where did the desire to piss off Source come from? Who created hate? Isn't Source responsible for having made humans (and angels) with the capacity to hate? Again, I was told yes, but that was where our free will came in. This still didn't make any sense to me. I’ve got free will but no choice? You will accept Jesus or you will go to hell. Does that sound like free will to you? The minds that schemed this all up also decided that thanks to the devil, a war was started between it and Source, with an agreement that the winner gets to claim Source's children. Meanwhile, the Bible is full of references about a Source who seeks vengeance against its enemies and will not tolerate evil. From what we read, is there a difference in attitudes between Source and the devil? It seems to me that, according to what has been written, Source is quite capable of doing all those horrible things that humans do to each other, such as hate and kill each other. Just look at the death and destruction nature brings. What I read in the Bible is that Source hates evil and either personally kills humans (through nature) or condones the killing of other humans (telling its "chosen" people to kill) who are evil. For example, it commissioned humans to declare war on other humans in the name of destroying anyone who sided with its enemy. So, it appears that it doesn't really matter whose side you're on, both sides have all the same traits and characteristics. The so-called devil hates both Source and humans and seeks to destroy humans, with the intent of hurting Source, and Source hates both the devil and those humans who side with it, and seeks to destroy them, with the intent of sending those who don't obey its rules to hell, not just for a designated period of time, but for eternity! I know this sounds like a pretty harsh Source, but from what we're told, Source allows the devil to take the ones who refuse to obey it down into hell, where it is free to torture these humans for eternity. Once there, Source turns a deaf ear to all cries for help, with no exception. Meanwhile, the devil I'm told, wants to get as many people as it can to be stuck down there burning with it, and Source seems to be ok with it tempting all its children into doing evil things. (Wow! Whoever made all this stuff up had quite an imagination! And, I might add, had a strong need for humans to receive corporal punishment as well). I had other questions. Why did Source think it had to control people's behavior by using fear as a motivator? Well, I was told there had to be consequences for disobeying Source, that Source is a just Source, and that it's better to follow Source's commandments out of fear than to not follow them at all. Armed with this line of logic, the priests and nuns drove fear into me with a vengeance. As I was attempting to make any sense of all this I was again reminded that humans have free will, that we have the choice of which one of these beings we're going to listen to, never mind that Source had the entire plan all in its head before it made even one creative move. Again, since Source is all knowing and is the creator, it had to know this was all going to happen, that the devil would rebel and that humans would give into it’s temptation, but that didn't seem to stop It from going ahead with it’s plan anyway. Does this make any sense? Well, by the time I was asking these kinds of questions I was beginning to get on the nerves of the priests. They told me some things are just a mystery and we may never understand them fully. In other words, “go away kid, you ask too many questions!” In 2005 I got inspired to write an imaginary conversation that might have gone on inside the mind of Source back when it was the only thing that existed, before it created anything. Recently I edited it and would like to share it here. If someone else could come up with this stuff, I felt that I at least wanted to point out that this person or persons didn’t think their ideas through very carefully. In this conversation I decided to draw on all the things most of us have been told about Source. Thus, as you read this, understand that this conversation could only have happened if Source really is like what we were told about it. With that in mind, I figured the conversation in its head might have gone something like this: Let's see, I want a world filled with a lot of humans and I want to give them free will but I also want to make sure one thing is clear, that they either obey me or suffer in hell for ever and ever. Of course, I know that by the mere fact that they have free will some of them will do many bad things because after all, they're going to have all my characteristics. Like me, they're going to be capable of coming up with all kinds of ideas, some will reflect my need to punish when I’m not obeyed, and some will not even agree with my ideas. Oh well, I can't afford to have them turning against me so I'll have no choice but to make them burn in hell forever and ever, to make an example out of them. They absolutely must obey me. I won't budge on that. I'm Source after all, so they'd better do what I say! Hmmm, on the other hand, can I live with that? I know I'll love these humans because they'll be my own creation, like having my children. I am the source of unconditional love after all. I'm incredibly excited just thinking about having some precious sons and daughters to give my love to. But, oh my God, am I going to be able to live with myself, always knowing that despite being an unconditional lover, I'm going to send some of them to hell forever, always knowing exactly how many are going to end up in heaven and how many are going to end up in hell? Always knowing the horrible things these children are going to do to each other—knowing this even before I create them? Oh boy, it breaks my heart just thinking about those unfortunate ones that I know are going to choose hell (for a moment Source is tearing up but then it comes its senses). So what! That's not my problem! I want these humans to have a chance to choose without realizing that I already know what they're going to choose. They won't be able to blame me because they had a choice, so what if I already knew! I don't want them to be robots, just following a pre-planned path. On the other hand, the fact that I'll know which ones will choose hell sounds a bit pre-planned, but even though I know, they won't, so when they choose hell they will be suffering the consequences of their own actions. Still, can I really live with that? I mean I'm talking being stuck in flames forever. Is that what my love is about? I'll love you absolutely unconditionally unless you don't obey me, in which case I'll make sure you pay the price, for eternity? Hmmm, something doesn’t sound right here. Oh well, it's clear that it will be their own damn fault because it will be their choice, not mine. I know, I know, I thought the whole idea up to give them a chance to choose heaven or hell despite knowing all along which way they're going to choose to go but what can I do? I just happen to know because I'm Source. I have no choice but to know beforehand because that's just me, you know, all-knowing, but they'll still have a choice, won't they? Oh, this is all very confusing and giving me a headache. I feel like I need a whole bottle of Advil! This all sounds like a plan to me. Now let me review what I’ve come up with so far. I'll plan on making a certain number of humans over several thousands of years, and I alone will know exactly how many there will be in the end. I'll make some angels to be servants for me but I'll make sure, even though it’s their choice as well, that some of them fall from my grace so that their leader can then tempt the first two humans so they will fall. Then I'll make them suffer for several years and at some point I'll split into three and one part of me will go down and get nailed to a cross. After that, all those who believe I died for them because I loved them so much will go to heaven and the rest, I'll send to hell. Yup, that's what I'll do alright. That’s my plan. I guess I'd better get busy with it. What? Yeah, I know, I know, the whole thing sounds quite boring actually. I mean, how exciting can it be watching this soap opera knowing from the start exactly what's going to happen? But I'm Source, so of course I'll know the entire plan as it unfolds, what else can I do since I'm all knowing? That's just the way it is. Oh, I know, I've got a great idea! At some point, I'll destroy the Earth. I don't want this soap opera to go on forever since I'm going to know exactly what's going to happen the entire time. I'd hate to have to endure that forever. Destroying the Earth will be the end of it. Yeah! Thank God somebody’s got an out here! Let's see, oh yeah, what am I going to do after it's all over and all those people will be burning in hell and the rest will be hanging out here with me, worshipping me? I don't know, I'll think of something. Wait a second. I'm all knowing so I must know already. Oh boy. Well, when I remember what I already know I'm going to do I won't discuss any of it with the humans, that’s for sure! They don't need to know. And one thing's for damn sure. Those people in hell are never going to be able to get out. I don't care how loving I am. I simply will not tolerate people who refuse to accept me when I'm hanging on that cross because all that pain and torture I'm going to have to experience will be all for them. I'm going to do it with total love for them so there's no way I'm going to let them off the hook if they won't accept that I love them that much! Sorry, I'm not that compassionate. I won't budge on this! Actually, I better not tell them too much about myself because I've got to be able to control their behavior. The less they know the better. I know, after I die on the cross I'll start a church and have the leader be the heir to my thrown. I'll call him the Pope and he won't be able to do any wrong. The humans will have to follow his word alone or else. I will consider all other words of all other humans to be false. He will be my representative on earth. Wow, I love this idea! Then I'll have them write a book and have them call it the Bible and it will be a record of my laws as well as my story. Anything that doesn't make sense about this whole plan, I'll have them call it a mystery, just to create a bit of intrigue. That way I'll be able to cover up the fact that none of this plan makes any sense to me either, since I'm the one who has unconditional love, which means having no agenda, but that's beside the point. There isn't any other Source around here for me to get any other ideas from so mine will have to do. Let me see, I know (of course I know, I'm Source, stupid), given my love for drama, I'll have a fair amount of corruption going on inside the church so that eventually some of them will rebel and make their own churches. Yeah, that's it, it adds to the drama! Of course I won't want this to happen, since I'd prefer that all follow my word, period, but gee, that would be really boring after awhile. I mean, can you imagine a world full of do-gooders? Nah, I like the idea of there being some evil tossed into the works. Hollywood will like it too. It'll make for good action movies. I'll think of a bunch of horrible things I'll let my children do to each other. Perhaps I'll create one called Hitler who will try to rule the world and I'll have him murder millions of my chosen people. I’ll have others commit heinous acts, such as cutting up a person's body with a chain saw or abusing them sexually so bad that they'll be totally screwed up psychologically for life. Yeah, yeah, you don't have to keep reminding me, I know that all these people are going to hell because of this. How many times do I have to tell you, even though I know that humans are going to do such horrible things even before I lift my finger to make the first creation, they're the ones responsible for their actions, not me. Let them choose to repent and accept Jesus! You can't hold me accountable for their actions. They're the ones thinking up all these insidious things, I just happen to know they're going to do these things because I’m fully capable of doing these things myself, but it won’t be my idea when they actually choose it. Geez, my heart is already beginning to break just thinking about all those poor unfortunate souls I can see right now in the future, burning in hell forever and ever for doing those terrible things. What's that? Oh, alright, I'll make a purgatory for those who only do a certain amount of bad things. That way some of them will eventually be able to get out of the fire. I'll decide on a how long to let them burn there for all their bad actions. I’ll also know ahead of time who they are. I'm warning them, they had better not cross the line of being bad vs. real bad or they'll never be able to get out of this hell! I won't compromise on this because somebody's got to make sure there's law and order on earth, otherwise things could get chaotic (who in the hell am I talking to anyway? Do I have a conscience?). Let me remind myself again, I won't actually be the one making it happen—they will. I just have the benefit of knowing they're going to do it ahead of time (Benefit?—this sounds more like a curse to me!). Anyway, I still say a few rebels will make it more exciting. If I'm going to be watching the whole thing knowing what the ending is going to be, it's at least going to have to be dramatic! In fact, why don't I have a few of them start their own religions? Oh, that won't be right because then they'll be worshipping false gods. Oh well, I know it's going to happen so I might as well let it happen, so what if they burn in hell forever and ever for worshipping a false god. Again, it's their choice. Hmmm, but what if they never have a chance to hear about how they can be saved? Shouldn’t I give them at least that chance? I know, I’ll send missionaries out all over the world and have them do whatever they got to do to convert the masses, even if that means torturing and/or killing anyone who stands in their way. Great idea! Ok, that settles it, that's my plan and I’m sticking to it. I don't want to hear another word questioning it. This conversation actually conveys quite well the essence of what I was actually taught! After writing this, I could understand that not even a child, let alone an adult of high IQ could possibly take it seriously. Who could make any real sense out of any of this stuff that I was told about Source? Yes, there was some sarcasm in the story, but that’s the point. For Source to actually be this kind of Source, it would have to be pretty sarcastic! That's why I knew that none of this could have actually come from Source. I wasn't stupid. Humans are the only ones who could have dreamed up such ideas about Source. In my own life, I could feel Source's love despite the fact that I was breaking all the rules by the time I was in high school. I wasn't attending Mass or going to Confession on a regular basis, and I felt tons of guilt as a result, but somewhere deep inside I knew Source was something much different than all these things I was being taught about it. I felt that it didn’t really care what choices I made. Regardless, it loved me any way. In my imagined conversation Source's love wasn't all that unconditional after all, for there was a requirement in its plan. Only on the condition that humans realize the suffering it went through just for them when he (Jesus) died on the cross and then invite Him into their hearts, can they be spared from eternal damnation. Anything short of this is cause to have to carry on in the fires of hell, forever and ever, with absolutely no hope of ever getting out! Can you imagine an unconditionally loving Source being like this? Apparently some (many) humans can! According to church doctrine, this condition existed from the very beginning of the human race, in the so-called Garden of Eden. As long as Adam and Eve stayed away from the fruit of the tree, they could enjoy the garden all they wanted. However, after one bite, well, the rest is history. Thus began the miserable suffering path humans have walked ever since. Obviously, this Source is not one you'd want to argue with. I'd hate to have an encounter with its wrath! Despite Jesus having come and gone over 2000 years ago, the doctrine tells us that Source still didn't want us to forget how our ancestors disobeyed it so the punishment for us while living on the earth remains the same—we have to go through a life of struggle while being tempted by the devil and it's imperative that we turn our life over to Jesus or we go to hell. In other words, Jesus did nothing to alleviate the suffering course that humans were walking. If anything, if one looks at the historical facts, life for humans after Jesus only got worse. The wars that were waged in the name of this new Christian Source under the guise of the Holy Roman Empire caused untold deaths (it still does!). In addition, the rigid dominating control the church exercised over the people created both fear and a lack of incentive for anyone to dare step outside of their authority! Doing so meant certain death. Can you imagine living on earth during those times? We can only assume that all the physical suffering was part of Source's plan too, since it's what is happening. If Jesus had brought physical salvation too, allowing humans to live in the Garden again after his death on the cross, the fact that he had bled and died for them might not have mattered much. It appears, if I understand the doctrine correctly, that Source was determined to make sure humans never forgot about its own suffering. After all, Source didn't deserve such a fate, right? We're told that being sinless and all, Jesus died anyway out of compassion for us sinners. Jesus never promised us a rose garden while we're alive. He only promised eternal life after we die! Actually, if you follow the logic of this teaching, Source never did have any plan to let humans live in a paradise. Even though it told Adam and Eve the Garden was their playground as long as they obeyed it, we all know that it knew before it even created them that they wouldn't obey, since it knows everything. And, it’s own plan made sure that even after Jesus died for them in order to save them, all those born afterwards would still be doomed to a life of struggle with temptation! Such doctrine is an assault on our intelligence. It places both Source and humans in major boxes, with lids that have been nailed so tightly shut for centuries that few have ever dared even trying to get out of them, let alone question the validity of what they see inside the box. It is my firm conviction that the real Christian message is much larger than the dogma. It is much larger than being a religion or a way of interacting with human beings according to rules and regulations. My perspective of the original point and purpose of Christ's life upon the Earth is that he wanted everyone to understand that we too are Source. He wanted very much for everyone to understand the healers that we are. Regarding his miracles, he said that this we can do and more. That was the love and truth that he brought to the planet, but it got distorted over time. I believe this distortion happened because of the personal need of humans to suppress their own capabilities. The early church believed that humans were not worthy of being just like Jesus was. It was very hard for human beings to embrace this perspective, that you could actually heal another human by laying hands upon them or even resurrect them from the dead. To have the ability to do such things places humans into the shoes of the creator and this we can't even imagine. In fact, it scares the hell out of us! What I know to be true is that Jesus Christ was an incredible spirit, but it was no less or no more than what every human being upon the earth is. To me, his message was that we are all Source-mates; divine just like he was. Thus, as I see it, the teachings of Christianity do a disservice to the remarkable beings that we all are, for we are all divine. The Bible says that Source made humans in its own image and it is full of examples of a Source who is jealous and full of anger and because of this, believes in corporal punishment for children who disobey it. Thus, realistically speaking, the Source described in the Bible sounds an awful lot like it was created by men—in their own image. We are the ones who are jealous, angry, and seek to punish those who have harmed us by putting to death those who have murdered our loved ones. How is it possible that such characteristics could be exhibited by a being of unconditional love? But this is what we are led to believe by the churches, and few if any humans have ever really questioned it seriously. My intent here is simply to inform. I've never liked being stuck in a
box and as I see it, the teachings of Christianity have caused humans
a great deal of suffering because of the illusions such doctrine causes.
Personally, I choose to think outside the box. The more I do, the freer
I become. It is my firm belief that all the concepts about humans being
sinners, about making Source a judge who won't tolerate evil, about the
need for a savior outside ourselves to get to Source—all such notions
were created in the minds of humans who had no idea how to take responsibility
to be the unconditional loving beings that they already were. We avoid
loving unconditionally because we don't believe it's possible and that's
because we're stuck in the illusion that we are separate from Source.
Step outside the illusion and there's an entirely different reality to
be experienced. The time has come for humans to become aware of this and
to adventure into the heart of a Source that lies deep inside each of
us, if we choose. It is there that you'll discover a world free of judgment,
agenda, and needs. It is there that peace is found—a peace that
passes understanding. It's all just a matter of choice. So far, such choice
has not been possible because until now, we have not had any such awareness
that we are in fact, one with the creator. Consequently, we have been
creating hell for ourselves with our free will. But this hasn't happened
because we were breaking some rules made up by Source. No, Source has
no agenda. This means Source doesn't care what experience we choose to
have. The nature of true love is to simply allow others to be exactly
what they are choosing to be. So the hell we've been choosing has happened
because that's where we've been placing our focus as creators. We've been
making life hell for ourselves because we haven't understood that we have
the ability to create heaven for ourselves, if only we would choose that.
It's not about having to obey rules, for such ideas were made up by humans
as a means of justifying the choice they were making to remain separate
from the creator. It's about simply choosing to be the love that we are.
Today we know we have such a choice, so it is now possible to break out
of all illusions that have convinced us otherwise. This requires that
we stop judging ourselves and instead, choose to love.
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